Fan Theory Explains How Ron Paul and Tim Duncan Are Basically The Same Guy

Person A might say that the Internet is an amazing place full of wonder and information. Person B might offer that the Internet is a fucking nutso file dump of every crazy thought every single person has ever considered. Both would be right. To that end, we bring you this 2009 thread from ronpaulforums.com where a user has unearthed some significant similarities between five-time NBA Champ and two-time MVP Tim Duncan, and United States congressman representing the 14th district in Texas, Ron Paul.

The criteria, as laid out by the user covers four categories: place of origin; "greatness at their professions;" character traits such as honesty, intelligence, clean living, and sportsmanship; rabid underground and internet followings, as highlighted by online polls. Let's take a look at the argument:

Tim Duncan is from the Virgin Islands, Ron Paul is from Pittsburgh.

Tim Duncan is a Hall-of-Famer with an untouchable career, but Michael Jordan is the consensus Greatest of All Time (and he played professional basketball, same as Timmy). Ron Paul, an American politician, has run for President in 1988, 2008, and 2012. Ron Paul has never been President of the United States of America.

We are not off to a great start.

Things get better once we get to the "tremendous underground and Internet following," however. Paul obviously has a very loyal and vocal support base—he did at least make a couple runs at the White House after all. It's not that Duncan never got his due while in the league—he was always regarded as the leader of one of the best teams in sports—but his personality was such that he flew under the radar and perhaps didn't have the clamoring of support that peers like Kobe Bryant had.

Which brings us to the lynchpin in the Ron Paul/Tim Duncan are Similar argument: an online poll conducted by the Sporting News that asks who is the best NBA athlete of the decade, Duncan or Kobe. Kobe apparently lead the voting at 52-48 percent clip. That was before Spurs fans found it online and voted their man over the top.

A sub-debate actually erupted concerning Bryant's qualifications to be in the poll at all, because he "played second banana to the most dominant player at the time." This is a reference to Shaquille O'Neal, and several users chimed in that it really should be between Duncan and Shaq. That's really neither here nor there, just know that a groundswell of support from Spurs fans—one said "I'm going to go ahead and reinstall windows so I can get another vote in for Tim."—put Duncan ahead of Kobe.

This is, by far, the most convincing argument put forth for the similarities between Tim Duncan and Ron Paul.

Kobe Bryant was named Sporting News NBA Athlete of the Decade in 2009, winning 55 percent of the fan vote.