Mitch Albom Would "Feel a lot Happier" If Erica Kinsman Donated her Settlement Money

God, shut up, Mitch Albom.

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Jan 31 2016, 11:08pm

God, Mitch Albom, what is your problem, man? Apparently the decomposing husk of The Sports Reporters, a semi-relevant sports discourse show previously hosted by the late Dick Schaap, is still flopping around somewhere on ESPN airwaves on Sunday mornings. However it is no longer semi-relevant, it merely exists, much like the two doddering chipmunks that bookend its panel: Mike Lupica and Mitch Albom.

This morning, the panel addressed Florida State's $950,000 settlement with Erica Kinsman, thereby discharging her Title IX suit against the school for institutional indifference in her reported sexual assault claim against Jameis Winston. In a brief statement on the matter, Albom pulls off the impossible: making Lupica seem sane and reasonable by comparison.

"First I'll say I'd feel a lot happier about this if the woman took the money and gave it to charity and said 'that's not what this was about.' I always am suspect when people end up saying, 'well, I'm gonna take [the money].'"

Mitch. Mitch? Mitch. What in the wide world of asshole sports reporters is this, man? A few notes.

  • No one, I mean no one gives a shit what would or would not make you "feel a lot happier" regarding a case about possible sexual assault. I promise you that Erica Kinsman does not.
  • Oh yeah, her name is Erica Kinsman. She's a real person, not some character in a Cormac McCarthy book.
  • Where do you, a stranger who is still somehow in a position to offer an opinion on something you almost certainly only have a superficial understanding about, get off telling a rape victim how to spend a settlement award?
  • "What this was about" is a school and athletic department disregarding a sexual assault claim because it involved their star quarterback. Perhaps a suggestion that Florida State match its settlement amount in a donation to a charity is more appropriate than divesting a victim whose entire life has been disrupted by these chickenshits?
  • Of all the dishonorable parties involved here, why are you requiring the victim to prove she is acting with pure intentions? You guys just called bullshit on the school's spin and still want to tell Kinsman how to behave.
  • Have you ever turned down money someone voluntarily gave you?
  • Disregard that last question.

h/t Jessica Luther