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When the World Expected Brazil to Burn, Brazilians Turned to Laughter

After a historically thorough beat down courtesy of Germany, all there was left to do in Brazil was laugh at the absurdity.
Feature photo by Robert Hanashiro/USA TODAY Sports. All others by the author.

Whether it's due to a misinterpretation of last year's protests or because violence sells papers, a lot of journalists spent the whole year predicting that there would be huge protests during this World Cup. When none happened, the focus moved to the bloody riots that were going to happen if and when Brazil lost.

Brazil got the crap kicked out of it last night to the inexplicable tune of 7-1, and despite the best efforts of some foreign news crews to make a group of eight thieves holding people up on Copacabana beach look like a nationwide riot, Brazil remained calm. This may have been the most humiliating loss for the Seleção since a 6-0 seal-clubbing at the hands of Uruguay in 1920.

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Sure, it may have been the first time Brazil lost an official match at home since 1975, but after a brief moment of panic and crying, faithfully captured by the 18,000 foreign journalists, most Brazilians have moved on to what they do best: Using laughter to cope with tragedy. Before the game even ended, social media was filled with jokes, like, "I went out to the back yard because I couldn't watch it anymore and my German Sheppard laughed at me."

Soon afterwards the memes appeared like this one above, featuring the gay hero of a recent soap opera crying on his pillow and saying, "I didn't know if it was a replay or another goal."

I walked out to the neighborhood newsstand here on Rio's North Side this morning to see what the headlines looked like and two old guys were laughing and trading Fred jokes.

"What did you think of Traffic Cone's performance last night?" One of them said.

Another imitated a popular newscaster and said, "'Fred: who is he? Where is he? What does he do?' tonight at 10."

The newspaper headlines are darker, but it's hard not to find humor in them as well. The headline of a Rio daily, O Dia, simply says, "Go to Hell, Big Phil!" Subtle. Very subtle.

And Lance, a soccer daily, left its front page blank, with the note, "Indignation, Revolt, Pain, Frustration, Irritation, Embarrassment, Pity, Disillusionment: Say what you are thinking and make your own headline!"

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As the sadness and anger begins to mix with laughter and with less than a week to go, some foreign journalists are still clinging to their perverse hopes that there will be huge riots.

"There are no riots today because it's raining, but I don't want to imagine how terrible it would be if Argentina wins the Cup," one such character said to me last night over beers in Lapa, the party neighborhood, at a table surrounded by laughing drunks.

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Brian Mier is an American ex-pat who lives in Rio. He is the author of Slow Ride. His previous work for Vice can be viewed here.