PornHub Wants to Sponsor an Italian Football Club

This article originally appeared on VICE Sports UK.

Football sponsors are boring, right? Airlines, car manufacturers, and tire companies. Insurance firms. Whatever the fuck is going on with Swansea City. What are you even trying to sell us, Swansea? We have literally no idea.

Serie A might be about to get something a little more attention-grabbing, however. Because according to Corriere dello Sport, the popular PornHub website – which, we probably don't need to tell you, is a purveyor of x-rated pornography – is searching for a top-tier Italian side to proudly carry their logo.

Clubs have been asked to submit proposals to the porn giants, who will then select one to financially support for the 2016-17 season.

Despite the moral outrage we're sure you're now experiencing, this wouldn't be their first foray into sports sponsorship. PornHub backed a University of Kent football side, but they were quickly told to either ditch the kit or be banned from the inter-college league.

PornHub also put their money into the Kildare basketball team in Ireland. A story on Joe.ie opined: "If these lads have any problems getting 'up' for the match, a simple look at the sponsors logo on their jerseys should sort them out quick smart." Confusingly, this implies that the PornHub logo itself is sexually arousing, perhaps in a Pavlov's Dog sort of way. Not that we're judging; whatever works for you, guys.

Of course, Serie A is a whole other level of sporting significance. Could we soon be set to see the PornHub logo grace sacred theatres of football like the San Siro or Stadio Olimpico? What about Champions League ties – are we really going to allow the name of a pornographic website into our quaint little English grounds? Shame! Scandal! Moral indignation!

But fear not, oh prudish reader – it's not all dead-eyed porn stars and impossibly buff men named Trent. We're told PornHub has a bit of football action, too. After Germany subjected Brazil to a 7-1 hammering at last summer's World Cup, they posted this tweet:

Please stop uploading the game highlights to Pornhub… Our public humiliation category is full. #BrazilvsGermany
— Pornhub ARIA (@Pornhub) July 8, 2014

Which, if nothing else, must have been a nice change from the relentless stream of pornography that PornHub's social media guy must transmit to the world on a daily basis. Have you posted the funny football tweet yet, Gary? Great, now, about the massive cocks series for Facebook…