Mike Francesa Does Not Have the Time for ESPN Hacks

Mike Francesa is the gold standard of sports talk radio. Not because of his vast knowledge of sports minutiae or his experience in the field but because he is an unrepentant and devastating troll. You simply cannot beat him. He says whatever he says and then if anyone ever criticizes him, he simply pays them no mind because they—meaning literally everyone else—are beneath him. And he says precisely that.

That brings us to last week, when Francesa said that the New York Islanders are a third-rate organization. A caller wondered if he would be attending any games at Barclays Center during the Islanders' second-round series against the Tampa Bay Lightning and Mike was not having any of it. The Islanders are not worth his time right now because they don't know what they're doing as an organization in terms of promoting the team. Now, this might seem like a weird reason not to go to a game, but Mike slipped up when he was responding to the caller. Francesa tried to have head coach Jack Capuano on the show but somehow the Islanders couldn't make it work. That is the reason the Islanders are a third-rate organization: because they left Mike hanging. He's an egomaniac and probably took it as a personal slight, so now he's out for blood.

Mike Francesa just absolutely destroyed Rick DiPietro for stepping to him.@HDumpty39 @alanhahn @awfulannouncinghttps://t.co/w5AqL6mYG1
— I Nevah Said That! (@RNs_Funhouse) May 3, 2016

Later on, former Islanders goalie Rick DiPietro responded on his own radio show, on the "rival" ESPN radio 98.7 FM in New York. He called Mike "fatso" when discussing his "third-rate organization" comments. Francesa, in turn, then bludgeoned DiPietro and ESPN in his usual dismissive way. This quote covers just about everything you need to know about Mike and his troll game:

"And you know what, I might have a warm spot for a team that was paying me through 2029, also, uh, when I did nothing except shoot my mouth off and basically somehow bilk em out of 15-year deal and have a losing record for my career. But I gather he said some disparaging things about me after I attacked the Islanders. I didn't say anything about him. Obviously I wouldn't pay much attention to him."

For some reason, Dan Le Batard decided to wade into these waters from all the way down in Miami. Le Batard called Francesa an "enormous, ego-soaked gasbag" for going after DiPietro in the way he did. And, of course, a caller informed Francesa about Le Batard's rant and he responded in pitch-perfect Mike form.

Mike Francesa isn't too concerned about "desperate" @LeBatardShow calling him an enormous, ego-soaked gasbag, okay?https://t.co/vd3bbMmsTf
— I Nevah Said That! (@RNs_Funhouse) May 5, 2016

As soon as he hears Le Batard's name, Francesa groans so dismissively, like he can't even believe he has to even think about some guy named Le Batard, let alone talk about him. And then it's classic Mike. Any criticism is immediately invalid because everyone's coming for the King to boost their own ratings. It's a brilliant debate tactic and nobody does it better. You cannot beat Mike Francesa specifically because you are trying to beat Mike Francesa.

h/t The Big Lead