Predicting the 2024 Hipster Starter Pack

Sometime in October, everyone at VICE put our collective heads together and came up with 31 signposts that define what it means to be a hipster in 2023, or whatever you want to call people who like mullets, natty wine and get overly excited about Grace Wales Bonner Sambas.

As we approach the end of the year, we’ve had to put some of our favourite things from the list into cold storage. (To those continuing to rock jorts in winter, we salute you – and to those whose tooth gems have somehow managed to survive the festive party season, you have our admiration.) To send off another year of silly trends, we thought it was only right to humbly throw forward a few predictions for 2024.

The tyranny of the tiny bow will continue well into 2024. Earrings, shoes, jumpers, husbands, potato croquettes: If in doubt, stick a ribbon on it. Expect to see Harry Styles wear some coquette-adjacent outfit in 2024 and watch everyone lose their minds.

Someone tell Jeremy Fragrance: According to Instagram’s recent survey, “fragrance creators are on the rise, as over 1/4 of Gen Z plan to express themselves by discovering a signature scent in 2024”. 

You can trace the precise moment of handover to the appearance of Saltburn’s finest cum-guzzler in a “slutty little vest” at the Academy Museum Gala.

Along with other classy or crafty BEOs (big evening out). Because debauched BNOs are out, and culturally-enriching sober-adjacent events are in. (Mushroom drops at a late-night museum don’t count, right?)

The Next Big Thing in emotional dance bangers that make you feel like you’re constantly coming up on life and love and, um, the drugs you’ve taken. See you in the Field of Dreams.

Oh, so you want an emotionally maladjusted night owl who keeps weird hours, is good with their hands, and has a problem with coke and commitment? This way to the kitchen, chef! 

A slight graduation from bed hair, this aesthetic allows you to dust your own skirting boards and mushroom lamp, finally.

But more than half of the people wearing it still remaining completely unclear it’s pronounced “STEWWW SEEEE” and not “STUH SEE”. Feel free to correct your late-to-the-game friends for extra points.

Think buns held up with gel (instead of scrunchies), leotards, and those ribbons on sticks that look like cat toys.

As the weather becomes ever more unpredictable, gorp-y trousers that zip off into shorts and skirts will become everyday essentials. Waterproof, fireproof and earthquake-proof for every occasion. 

We keep moving up in the world of XL scrunchies, and this winter has been the season of the babushka scarf face-wrap. Next, expect to combine the two for a scarf that also keeps your hair in place. 

Billie Eilish got a trippy back tat that basically covers her whole spine, so I got a trippy back tat that basically covers my whole spine.

IYKYK.

Former snobs are really vibing that post-industrial, former mining town aesthetic ever since Chanel took their Metiers D’Art show to Manchester and gave the city’s working class style an old-money tweed twist. See you in Hull in 2024!