Arian Foster, Always One Step Ahead

Arian Foster, an All-Pro NFL running back with four Pro Bowl nods, announced his retirement on Tuesday:

BREAKING NEWS: @ArianFoster announces his retirement on UNINTERRUPTED. His story on why he's walking away. pic.twitter.com/FK09XpkqUo
— UNINTERRUPTED (@uninterrupted) October 25, 2016

Foster entered the league as an undrafted free agent, and left it a backbencher in a running back committee. In between, he was the most tantalizing player in football—on and off the field.

He achieved more than the vast majority of players ever do. Over his first three years as a starter, he led the league by turn in rushing yards, attempts, and touchdowns. He gained 8,873 yards from scrimmage, ninth most in the NFL over that period. He scored 68 touchdowns, more than anybody but Adrian Peterson.

Only Jamaal Charles averaged more yards per start; among running backs, only Charles and LeSean McCoy averaged more yards per touch. Game for game, touch for touch, Foster was dangerous and explosive as any skill-position player on the planet.

Yet, he didn't always seem to be on the same planet as the rest of us.

From his famous namaste-bow celebration to announcing an IPO for, um, himself, it's been impossible not to notice Foster spending a lot of time thinking very hard about his place in the game, and what it all means.

After years of quiet critique of the way NFL culture steeps itself in a certain brand of evangelical Christianity, Foster came out as an avowed atheist.

"As I'm digging deeper into myself and my truth," he explained to ESPN's Tim Keown, "just being me is more important than being sexy to Pepsi or whoever. After a while, what's an extra dollar compared to the freedom of being you? That's the choice I made."

Yet while Foster chose the freedom to be himself, he never quite shared all of himself with us. The Players' Tribune would be perfect for a "different" athlete like Foster to speak his mind, but Foster's only piece there is a silly little fill-in-the-blank that never gets deeper than his fear of snakes.He often asked questions, but rarely made statements. He invited discussion, rather than speaking his mind. He never refused to Honor America, but followed Colin Kaepernick in taking a knee during the anthem. "I don't even think the song should be our national anthem, because it's a racist song, if you look at the other verses of it," he had recently told VICE News.

It's even right there in his retirement statement: He's "proud to have taken part" in the game's legacy of "faceless gladiators," and says the game has been "everything" to him. Though we have a pretty good idea that he's a pretty smart guy with a lot of pretty cool things to say, he never put himself before the game.

Foster never antagonized football culture quite enough to become a villain, but he never did quite enough on the field to be a hero, either. Texans fans, fantasy owners, and Hall of Fame voters will almost certainly remember Foster, first and foremost, for how much better he could have been.

Over his last four seasons, he started only 27 of 64 games. Just as he was ascending into the pantheon of on-field greats, injuries robbed us of his talent again and again. Just as he was feeling "established in this league" enough to speak his mind, as he told Keown, his body betrayed him.

His farewell statement waxes rapturously about his love for the game, yet ends with a sly allusion to mental disabilities it may have already doomed him to.

NFL fans were incredibly lucky to witness Foster in action, and even luckier to see what little glimpses he gave us of the man under the helmet. He gave so much more than many ever do to the game, while also managing to save a little piece of himself for himself. Let's celebrate that as the remarkable accomplishment it is.